All the British fans start singing to the German fans, 'If you won the war, stand up!' Right, I think this is the greatest thing I've ever heard at a sporting event because there's no snappy comeback for that, is there?

You'll always feel good about your body when you go there -- no matter what your body is -- because there's always someone there who weighs 350 pounds more than you'll ever weigh.

I knew that I'd lived in New York too long when, a few years ago, I was on a subway going downtown, and it stopped at 14th Street. At the station, the doors opened, and the conductor announced that there was a bomb on board and we should evacuate immediately. Nobody moved. We just looked at each other, 'Do you see a bomb?' 'I don't see a bomb.' 'There's no bomb.' 'I've only got two stops -- let's go for it.'

I heard this guy going around talking about how he was this big rap producer, and he was just going around and boasting and bragging. And in one of those bragging sessions, I heard him just tell somebody, 'Hey, hey -- why don't you try making four beats a day for two summers?' What a dangerously specific challenge that is.